8/15/00: ok, a long overdue redesign has taken place.  unfortunately, the counter got reset (it was close to 4900!) but there are some new additions, and the archives have been rearranged by year.  whaddya think?  the rachel page is still under construction and i still need to fix up some of the pictures pages, but i'm just about done.  the newest addition is a sweet little missive from my friend edith.  edith and i have choreographed a dance routine to "Give it to You," which we are just sad enough to perform if you ask nicely.  yes, she has a boyfriend, you fucking perverts!
6/17/00: I'm still working on the page for Rachel, but I went ahead and added a new picture on my last photo page of my brother and I, and I can only take so much heartache in one day.  On another note, I highly recommend "Pecker."  Why did this movie get absolutely no attention?
5/29/00: Someone suggested that my next salon be a chance to explore artistic possibilities and talents, by having everyone bring art supplies and draw.  He then suggested we draw a nude model--and promptly volunteered his services (only to later withdraw them after a few of us expressed interest).  :-)  Now I don't think the nude model thing is such a good idea, considering that none of us has experience with this (ahem) medium.  But I was thinking it may not be a bad idea to, say, split up in pairs and draw each other.  What do you think?
3/26/00: I apologize for the delay but I just couldn't figure out how best to incorporate new pictures into the site.  I didn't want to simply add them onto the end of the existing pages; if I did that, folks would have to scroll through 8 or 9 pages of old photos just to get to the new ones (this is basically the same problem I now have archiving these news updates).  At any rate, I decided to put the new pictures in the slide show you see above.  At some point, though, I'll have to move them elsewhere.  Any suggestions?

The photos above consist primarily of volleyball pictures and pictures from the cigar dinner Amaury and I had with an attorney from my old firm.  The cigar dinner, as you may recall, involved a rifle demonstration, so don't think I joined the NRA when you look at the pictures.  ;-)

Our volleyball team was beaten in the first round of playoffs, but you knew that was going to happen.  Now that the weather is warmer, I'll probably be setting up a game at my house soon, so if you'd like to play a game or two on a sand court in the ghetto, let me know.  I hope to move at some point this year, so this little luxury will not last forever.

Finally, won't you please read my epinions?  Better yet, won't you sign up and use me as your referral?  I'll love you forever; I promise.
3/6/00: I know it's been over a month but I've been extremely busy, in my own way.  ;-)  First of all, International Women's Day is March 8th.  To protest the fact that the majority of the unpaid labor in the world is done by women, there is an international strike, "for a millennium which values all women's work and all women's lives"; read more about it here.  I hope the women reading this will join women around the world (and me!) on the first global women's strike by doing no housework or other unpaid labor on March 8th.

In other news, I have now lost 10 pounds!  1 1/2 hours every day at the gym is paying off; I am slowly becoming the fittest I've ever been in my life, as I promised myself I would.  As Cedric says, I am now hard core.  On the volleyball front, our team has a double-header Sunday, which we expect to lose, as usual.  We had to forfeit this week because our other woman couldn't make it (must have at least two women on the court) and we didn't have a replacement, but I don't think it would have made any difference in the outcome (we played them anyway just for fun and lost).  I'll be setting up a "volleyball day" at my apartment soon, now that the weather is warmer.

I'll be adding a new page soon for my friend Rachel, and taking down the poll as well.  If you have any suggestions for other improvements/changes, let me know. 
2/2/00:  I can barely sit, stand or walk today because of my goddamn regimen, but I soldier on.  In better news, I recently made the acquaintance of Virginia Vitzthum, a columnist at Salon.  She's an excellent writer, and her columns are always interesting, entertaining and incisive--you can see an archive of them by clicking her name.

The one that just had to get special mention, especially in light of recent events, is her column about blow jobs (written in 1998 in response to the Clinton debacle).  It has to do with people's inability to discuss a pretty common sexual act--sound familiar?  Unfortunately, it doesn't offer advice to those insistent on blowing the ugliest and goofiest men they can get their hands on (you know who you are), but some things just aren't meant to be fixed.

Finally, I think my archives should be switched around--in other words, when you click "More" below, you should get the next most recent updates, and read backwards in time.  Instead, I have it so that you have to start with 1998, and read forwards in time.  Pretty asinine, huh?  I don't know why I set it up that way.  Do you have any ideas on how to fix it, without me rearranging every single page?  If so, I'll love you forever--please email me.  I still have that baseball cap ("The Gentleman Hunter"), which I'll send myself to the first person who fixes this problem--and actually wants the cap.
1/25/00: I did it!  I'm finally outta there--and on my own terms.  Thanks to everyone who wrote, called, counselled me or otherwise lent their support; it really makes a difference when people of all types chime in to say they believe in you and support your cause (special thanks to Paul at the Freedom Forum).  For those of you who don't know what happened--where have you been?  Email me and I'll fill you in--it's too long to get into here.  Suffice it to say that it involves what one friend of mine calls the "Single White Female"--that just about says it all.

On other fronts, our volleyball team lost again, but we had a lot of fun doing it.  We don't have another game for a few weeks now, so if you know of a place for us to practice in the meantime, let me know.  I called every recreational center in the metro area, and couldn't find any indoor courts available on weekends.

And yes, the trip to Paris was wonderful.  I was quite ill for some of it (including New Year's Eve)--the sickest I've ever been in my adult life, I think--but I actually viewed it as a kind of catharsis.  Going to a doctor in Paris was a neat experience as well: they commonly don't have separate examining rooms, so the whole shebang is conducted in the doctor's library/den/office.  And folks, it was about $20--for which, if I was French, I would have been reimbursed.  Their health care system is unbelievable.
1/16/00: We're back from Paris and I have LOTS to report, so I'll do a bigger update shortly.  For now, just know that we had a good time; that our first volleyball game is tonight; and that the extreme jealousy (playa hatin', for those of us in the know) continues.  I'll update you on the situation shortly; if you can't wait, email me and I'll give you the inside scoop.
2000
the hits, misses, rants and raves that constitute my life
1/16/00: We're back from Paris and I have LOTS to report, so I'll do a bigger update shortly.  For now, just know that we had a good time; that our first volleyball game is tonight; and that the extreme jealousy (playa hatin', for those of us in the know) continues.  I'll update you on the situation shortly; if you can't wait, email me and I'll give you the inside scoop.
1/25/00: I did it!  I'm finally outta there--and on my own terms.  Thanks to everyone who wrote, called, counselled me or otherwise lent their support; it really makes a difference when people of all types chime in to say they believe in you and support your cause (special thanks to Paul at the Freedom Forum).  For those of you who don't know what happened--where have you been?  Email me and I'll fill you in--it's too long to get into here.  Suffice it to say that it involves what one friend of mine calls the "Single White Female"--that just about says it all.

On other fronts, our volleyball team lost again, but we had a lot of fun doing it.  We don't have another game for a few weeks now, so if you know of a place for us to practice in the meantime, let me know.  I called every recreational center in the metro area, and couldn't find any indoor courts available on weekends.

And yes, the trip to Paris was wonderful.  I was quite ill for some of it (including New Year's Eve)--the sickest I've ever been in my adult life, I think--but I actually viewed it as a kind of catharsis.  Going to a doctor in Paris was a neat experience as well: they commonly don't have separate examining rooms, so the whole shebang is conducted in the doctor's library/den/office.  And folks, it was about $20--for which, if I was French, I would have been reimbursed.  Their health care system is unbelievable.
1/29/00: Well, we had dinner with an attorney from my old firm Thursday night, and the most fun we've had in a while.  Here are the main points:  I came home with about 6 cigars, 2 cigar cutters, a "The Gentleman Hunter" baseball cap, and a full men's cologne gift basket.  During dinner, we participated in a shotgun/rifle demonstration, and I gave the toast to the United States Air Force.  Yes, this actually happened.  We got home around 3 a.m. and the day after was hell.  But we had a great time and met a lot of interesting people.

As for the poll, everyone seems to be in between blow jobs--pretty hysterical (Jill, I should have known you'd pick that one).  Some of you aren't being honest, though; you've been talking about me to distract others from your mundane existence.  Come on, be honest and click the right button!  I accidentally reset some of the stats but that shouldn't happen again.
2/2/00:  I can barely sit, stand or walk today because of my goddamn regimen, but I soldier on.  In better news, I recently made the acquaintance of Virginia Vitzthum, a columnist at Salon.  She's an excellent writer, and her columns are always interesting, entertaining and incisive--you can see an archive of them by clicking her name.

The one that just had to get special mention, especially in light of recent events, is her column about blow jobs (written in 1998 in response to the Clinton debacle).  It has to do with people's inability to discuss a pretty common sexual act--sound familiar?  Unfortunately, it doesn't offer advice to those insistent on blowing the ugliest and goofiest men they can get their hands on (you know who you are), but some things just aren't meant to be fixed.

Finally, I think my archives should be switched around--in other words, when you click "More" below, you should get the next most recent updates, and read backwards in time.  Instead, I have it so that you have to start with 1998, and read forwards in time.  Pretty asinine, huh?  I don't know why I set it up that way.  Do you have any ideas on how to fix it, without me rearranging every single page?  If so, I'll love you forever--please email me.  I still have that baseball cap ("The Gentleman Hunter"), which I'll send myself to the first person who fixes this problem--and actually wants the cap.
3/6/00: I know it's been over a month but I've been extremely busy, in my own way.  ;-)  First of all, International Women's Day is March 8th.  To protest the fact that the majority of the unpaid labor in the world is done by women, there is an international strike, "for a millennium which values all women's work and all women's lives"; read more about it here.  I hope the women reading this will join women around the world (and me!) on the first global women's strike by doing no housework or other unpaid labor on March 8th.

In other news, I have now lost 10 pounds!  1 1/2 hours every day at the gym is paying off; I am slowly becoming the fittest I've ever been in my life, as I promised myself I would.  As Cedric says, I am now hard core.  On the volleyball front, our team has a double-header Sunday, which we expect to lose, as usual.  We had to forfeit this week because our other woman couldn't make it (must have at least two women on the court) and we didn't have a replacement, but I don't think it would have made any difference in the outcome (we played them anyway just for fun and lost).  I'll be setting up a "volleyball day" at my apartment soon, now that the weather is warmer.

I'll be adding a new page soon for my friend Rachel, and taking down the poll as well.  If you have any suggestions for other improvements/changes, let me know. 
3/26/00: I apologize for the delay but I just couldn't figure out how best to incorporate new pictures into the site.  I didn't want to simply add them onto the end of the existing pages; if I did that, folks would have to scroll through 8 or 9 pages of old photos just to get to the new ones (this is basically the same problem I now have archiving these news updates).  At any rate, I decided to put the new pictures in the slide show you see above.  At some point, though, I'll have to move them elsewhere.  Any suggestions?

The photos above consist primarily of volleyball pictures and pictures from the cigar dinner Amaury and I had with an attorney from my old firm.  The cigar dinner, as you may recall, involved a rifle demonstration, so don't think I joined the NRA when you look at the pictures.  ;-)

Our volleyball team was beaten in the first round of playoffs, but you knew that was going to happen.  Now that the weather is warmer, I'll probably be setting up a game at my house soon, so if you'd like to play a game or two on a sand court in the ghetto, let me know.  I hope to move at some point this year, so this little luxury will not last forever.

Finally, won't you please read my epinions?  Better yet, won't you sign up and use me as your referral?  I'll love you forever; I promise.
5/13/00: I just got back from a business trip to Orlando and it was definitely a strange experience.  I fully expected to hate all the Disney trappings--and, of course, I did.  But I was really moved by the whole experience of being back in Florida: seeing palm trees, smelling the air, lizards, birds--even the same grass we used to have.  The weather was wonderful; for the first time in probably most of my adult life, I found myself enjoying the outdoors.  I sort of had a revelation then, that it was probably the type of weather that was actually comfortable (unlike horribly hot and humid summers in the mid-Atlantic region): low 80's, nice breezes, that whole thing.   That, in other words, maybe I didn't really hate the outdoors as much as I thought I did: just the outdoors here.
5/29/00: Someone suggested that my next salon be a chance to explore artistic possibilities and talents, by having everyone bring art supplies and draw.  He then suggested we draw a nude model--and promptly volunteered his services (only to later withdraw them after a few of us expressed interest).  :-)  Now I don't think the nude model thing is such a good idea, considering that none of us has experience with this (ahem) medium.  But I was thinking it may not be a bad idea to, say, split up in pairs and draw each other.  What do you think?
6/15/00: I have no voice from coughing all week, but other than being deathly ill, I have no news to report.  I've therefore added a video which expresses my feelings at this point.  I also added the ability to talk live with me; of course, you gotta catch me in here first.
6/17/00: I'm still working on the page for Rachel, but I went ahead and added a new picture on my last photo page of my brother and I, and I can only take so much heartache in one day.  On another note, I highly recommend "Pecker."  Why did this movie get absolutely no attention?
6/23/00:   I was searching the internet for quite something else and came across something a girl I was in boarding school with wrote about me.  The horror of reading what someone else writes about you is pretty overwhelming; I've pasted it here if you'd like to have a laugh.  The term "show barn" refers to the fact that we had to milk cows at Milton Hershey School: the show barn was the barn the tourists were allowed to see when they came to visit.

"I remember barn. I was in maizeland, the SHOW barn!!! We had the white coveralls. I remember getting kathy depasquale in there as a freshman. They had her chasing a cow to catch their ***t and check for tapeworms. She did it for awhile and then slipped face first into a pile of it!!!"
6/25/00:  I saw Marcel Marceau today at the Columbia Arts Festival.  It was definitely a unique experience.  Not enriched, mind you, by the prick behind us who was narrating the entire time, sotto voce ("OK, now he's a bird in a cage.  Now, you see, the bird is flying.  I don't know what's happening now.  OK, now he's a judge...").  It didn't end until someone finally told him to stop; at intermission, I told one of the volunteers, who was horrified (she told me Marceau has been known to leave the stage when that type of thing happens). 
8/15/00: ok, a long overdue redesign has taken place.  unfortunately, the counter got reset (it was close to 4900!) but there are some new additions, and the archives have been rearranged by year.  whaddya think?  the rachel page is still under construction and i still need to fix up some of the pictures pages, but i'm just about done.  the newest addition is a sweet little missive from my friend edith.  edith and i have choreographed a dance routine to "Give it to You," which we are just sad enough to perform if you ask nicely.  yes, she has a boyfriend, you fucking perverts!
8/16/00: those of you who know me are going to be surprised by this, but i do have actual blood relatives.  a few weeks ago, i actually got in touch with one of them: my cousin, don.  he's living in florida and seems, at this point, to be relatively normal, which is more than can be said for most of us.  his mother and my mother are sisters; it's a toss-up as to who is more insane, but i think his mother might just have the edge.
8/28/00: i watched a documentary about prostitution made by chris g., my friend jill's partner.   the rage you feel when you hear these women's stories is unbearable.  what will it take to make these men stop?  all these things they think are "harmless": strip clubs, massage parlors (all fronts for prostitution)....they're fucking us up.  when will so-called "good" men step up to the plate and change things?  i realize this isn't exactly a coherent commentary, but I'm so angry and tired of men who, you know, go to strip clubs occasionally and that's it, and think it's "ok."  who think they're not part of the problem.  men who rape women.  men who frequent massage parlors.  tricks.  even men who do none of the above, but do nothing to change other men.  they're not gonna listen to us.  racists only change when white people show that it's unacceptable, and men are only going to change when other men, in large groups, tell them to fucking STOP.  are there any men out there doing this?
9/1/00:  me, smedith and tiffanwolf played volleyball with a bunch of other nuts at my complex (coined as 'bg'--'beyond ghetto'--by a former denizen of the area) last nite.  afterwards, we came back to my apartment and ordered a pizza.  now, keep in mind that in order to get the pizza (they weren't delivering), edith had to climb a tree infested with weird, 4-inch beetles, and upon our return, the 3 of us had to slide underneath my property gate on our stomachs along the asphalt.

ok, we didn't have to do these things, but we would have had to walk all the way around the building complex otherwise, and that would have added at least 15 minutes onto our trip.
9/15/00: men at the gym: DO NOT WEAR A TANK TOP OR OTHER SLEEVELESS SHIRT.  you smell.  'kay?  seriously.  this is not even taking into consideration all the sweat and goo you drip all over every piece of machinery and anyone happening by.  people are nauseated by your horrendous smell; i know i personally have almost vomited several times.  these men are totally oblivious to the fact that people who are not even NEAR them are choking.  QUIT IT.   you're gross.  seriously.  christ!

ok, edith and i went to a cigar dinner at the army navy club last night and that was pretty hilarious.  i'm just not going to take up people's time with this cuz you've heard it all before.  edith gave the toast to the u.s. marine corps.

also, i want to know if anyone else thinks the parade of nations is HILARIOUS.   and, er, could someone tell katie couric and bob costas to shut the fuck up?  they ruined the opening ceremonies.  for those of you out of the loop:  i am speaking of the olympics, at which, it pains me to say, i am not.  but consider me locked down for the next two weeks while it's on.
10/18/00: brooklyn, son.  yes, i'm holding it down in brooklyn now.  it's been a while but i'm just now starting to get caught up with stuff.  my birthday's coming up this weekend and i'm kinda freaked about that too. i'm getting old, man.

10/27/00: i saw this biography on ted kaczynski a few years ago and they were quoting from a letter he'd written to someone in his family.  he said something like, 'why can't you just leave me alone and stop contacting me?'  at the time, it clicked with me, and it kinda became a joke, that i was like ted kaczynski.  but seriously, i believe it now.  i am a sociopath.  my heart is a cold, hard stone.  for some people, anyway.

11/24/00: i had an idea last week to change this section (starting in 2001).  the whole thing started out as an interesting concept in 1998, but the fact is that too many people keep tabs on me now.  you've got the losers at 'the firm' checking my site every other week, coupled with too many people in my current life who, er, shouldn't be reading this stuff.  and while the whole point of it was a forum to express myself, i now find myself constrained by all the eyez on me.

so, starting in 2001, this is going to change into 'subway chronicles'.  the idea came to me because i found myself sharing frequent stories about daily escapades on new york city's subway system.  rather than rants, raves, updates and journal entries from my personal life, then, i'd be focusing on my life as it is lived on the subways.  i'm pretty much set on this, but still, i want feedback.  what do you think?

2/12/01:  look, i know it's been over two months.  there's no excuse--i'm not saying there is.  life has interfered with my updating this site.  it's still going to change into subway chronicles.  give me some time.   in the meantime, i'll be in italy next month.  i expect that trip to change my life.  send me tips on where to go and what to see.  i fly into venice.